I don't mind if you tend to date fat girls, or really even if you get some specific pleasure from being with a fat woman -- but I don't need that to be the first thing you tell me about yourself. " It's announced as if it's supposed to reassure me that they aren't going to take one look at me naked and run, I think? Or maybe it's meant to suggest some kink; like to let me know that he wants to feed me cakes and watch me weigh myself? If you care more about my weight than I do, we're going to have a problem. When you tell me I'm not, what you are really saying is that despite my body size, I'm not all those horrible things you tend to associate with fatness.
I have experienced sexual assault and trauma in my life.And yes, I even enjoy going out for a good meal if you can manage not to make a big deal out of it. There are some places, some days, when I just don't want to interact with certain people or try to make my body fit into the world.Transit -- from buses and taxis all the way to airplanes -- can lead to downright hostile environments.I'm not likely to fit on most of the rides at the amusement park and the thought of eating a meal sitting in a rickety plastic chair puts me on high alert.
Dating as a polyamorous woman brings with it a lifetime's worth of misconceptions and jealousies.
Add a few extra layers of fat to that experience, and things can get depressing real fast.