Making a decision on the fly with no forethought is a recipe for going too far. Is it in our best interest to engage in these practices prior to marriage? For those who have adopted the standards of behavior endorsed by today’s entertainment industry, these are stupid questions.In fact, they are non-questions—meaning they just aren’t asked. For those dating, it can be exhilarating—actual, real-live, skin-to-skin contact with someone of the opposite sex.And while it isn’t sexual union, it can definitely be sexy.Just ask any red-blooded male or female who has had a close encounter with Miss Good Looking or Mr. Hand-holding, hugging, kissing or any other similar contact can be oh so delightful.The time to make decisions about physical contact is before you get in a touchy situation.When people believe it is to have sex before marriage, a little (or a lot of) touching doesn’t really mean anything. Two young people fall in love and, before they are married, they decide to have sex.Even though current stats show that the majority of high school students don’t have sex, many movies like this present this scene as the norm for young people before they say “I do.” The way it unfolds is true to life. In Genesis , God explains how and when a sexual union between a man and a woman should take place: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (emphasis added throughout). The Bible doesn’t specifically address these areas.
To help you establish godly standards, consider the following advice given by a panel of young American Christians between the ages of 20 and 30. While the names are changed to preserve each person’s identity, the comments are genuine. is “ if you plan to marry him or her, when you both feel like the other is the right one for you.” Continuing, she said, “I wouldn’t hold hands with someone who I felt to be ‘just a date’ or someone I was mildly interested in, or even just plain had a crush on.I think holding hands is a sign that ‘this is the one for me’ to all the world, and that is just not something I want to do with just anyone.” Bill, 28 and married to Sue, said that he didn’t have a rule about holding hands before he was married but realized that “those first thrilling physical touches when one is young can often open the door to premature intimacy and big life mistakes.” Continuing, he remarked, “If I could do it all over again, I would refrain from hand-holding until becoming engaged (and then make sure the engagement was brief enough so as to minimize any potential problems).